Living Fearless

I follow several bloggers who pick a word each year that they want to focus on for the entire year. Its a word that speaks to them, that they want to live by and that they feel God is directing them towards. The organization describes it as "choosing to live with purpose and intentionality."

I've been thinking and praying on this idea a lot during these first three weeks of 2014. After thoughtful consideration, my word for this coming year is fearless.  I have mentioned before that I have often lived making decisions that are rooted in fear.  I have also seen that a life that operates out of fear can be just as damaging and heartbreaking as a life lived in which you aren't held back by the scary potential of an outcome that will hurt.

I have learned much of this the hard way. I've also learned that when the ground falls out from underneath you, He is there to hold you and that He can work those hurtful and difficult things out for good and for glory.  The Lord has held me through heartache and pain and He has produced peace and joy in me, which I am abundantly thankful for.

But I am still a work in progress and I have growing to do in the area of learning to believe that I have nothing to be afraid of because God loves me and is for me. New situations, blessings, and sources of hope can also be frightening if I allow them to be because they require me to step out in faith.  They require me to put my heart on the line and they can expose old wounds.

I trust in a good and loving God though, and so this year I want to walk by that faith and learn to live a life that is fearless. I think the first step in that journey is found in 1 John 4:18, "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear. . ."  The grace in this verse is that it is not my love that casts out fear, it is His love that is perfect and that has the ability to destroy the bondage of fear.  When I learn who I am in Christ, and when I can fully grasp how completely and perfectly my savior loves me - it paves the way for me to live a life of freedom.

So instead of a long list of resolutions this year, I am setting my sights on one thing. I am asking the Lord to walk me through this journey of becoming secure in His love for me and unafraid of anything that may come, so that I can in turn freely give love out to those in my life.

Beauty in the Brokenness

"I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh." Ezekiel 36:26

The holidays have come and gone, and we are already two weeks into the new year. I love beginnings and I love the hope that the start of a new year brings with it. A blank slate, a fresh start and the time to put another foot forward.

This new year ushered in with it a lot of sickness for my household. The holidays and first week of 2014 had been filled with fevers, runny noses, ear infections, and strep throat - just to name a few of the not so fun symptoms, for both the little ones and myself.  So we have seen a lot of the inside of our home and by the end we're all going a bit stir crazy.

Thankfully, we are all better and things are settling back into the normal routine. To be honest, in the thick of it, it felt like a crummy way to start a new year. It felt discouraging to feel so terrible and to be stuck at home. The middle of the night fever sweats and body aches, combined with the cries of a 3 year old just as sick, felt overwhelming. My body felt broken and at times, my spirit did as well.

It had me thinking a lot about the idea of brokenness. I am recognizing that we are all broken in one form or another, and that we won't be fully whole until we get to the other side. However, there is also beauty in the brokenness and there is hope.

There is a God that is healing us if we allow Him to. He sees past the broken parts to what we can be. He, whose body was broken so that I may have life and freedom, He understands my brokenness and wants to use it. And in my brokenness, He pours out His grace upon me and shows me His love. He paints the sky brilliant shades of color to remind me He is here.

He sees the beauty that can come from the wounds and the hurts, and He promises more. He has promised that He is close to the broken hearted, and aren't we all dealing with a broken heart in some way as we live in this imperfect world?

He has promised to breath life into our broken hearts and to use us where we are at. There is hope and comfort in that knowledge. There is beauty in the brokenness as we allow our broken pieces to draw us closer to Him - the great Healer and Restorer.

Never Letting Go

 

No shadow comes without the light making a way

No raging storm can ever defy one word of faith

My heart remains sure in the wind, sure in the waves

 

You are the anchor for my soul

You won't let go

You won't let go

No matter what may come I know

You won't let go

You won't let go

 

No valley low, changes the truth

So I'm not afraid

You hold me close

You lead me through and light up the way

~Michael W. Smith, You Won't Let Go

 

I've been making a conscious effort this Christmas season to be aware and full of the Lord's Spirit as I prepare for celebrating his birth. I won't pretend that there haven't been moments during the past few weeks where this resolution of mine is put to the test.

There have been many reminders during this time though that show me He never lets go.  In His love for me, He has blessed me with a song, a wise word, or a perfectly timed Bible verse that shows He is here and He is enough. In the thick of it, it can be tough to feel that. Yet I'm learning that no matter what I feel in the moment, I know what is truth and that truth doesn't change.

So whether it is in the mountain top moments or the valley low moments - I know the truth, and that truth will set me free:

I know that nothing can separate me from God's love. Romans 8:38-39

I know that His joy is strength.  Nehemiah 8:10

I know that if I search for Him, I will find Him. Deuteronomy 4:29b

I know that His very breath courses through me, giving new life. Ezekiel 37:5

I know that the Lord stands with me. 2 Timothy 4:17

I know that He delights in me and with His love, He will calm all of my fears. Zephaniah 3:17 

May you too during this holiday season and in the new year to come, remember these truths and find comfort in His love for us. May He be the anchor for your soul and may you rest in the fact that He will never let go of you.

Peace on Earth and in Our Hearts

"And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger." Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those whom his favor rests." Luke 2: 8-14

This second Sunday of Advent they lit the candle of peace and I bow my head to silently remember that He promised peace here on this earth.  Not the kind of peace that comes from believing we have it all figured out and that we are in control. But the peace that is beyond reason or understanding, and that wraps itself around our hearts whispering that there is a bigger plan.

In the middle of the busyness of the season, the lines and the crowds, the tantrums, the tears, the laughter and cookie baking, the cuddles and snuggles, the tight hugs and "I love you's," the unpredictable and the scary - in the middle of it all He beckons us to rest in Him and receive His peace.

He invites us into the hope that arrived that night in the form of a tiny baby crying out for its mother, so unassuming as he lay in a manger. He whispers, "trust me and there you will find peace." And my heart, that feels so fragile right now, yearns to let go and free fall into the peace that He offers. In the world that I cannot control, I ask that He will help me to trust and have faith that He is going before me and walking with me in each moment. I return to my constant prayer during this season, "Lord fill me with your presence and your Spirit; I need more of You." 

Wishing you peace this season too.

The Season of Advent

"No matter your story before, this is your beginning now: you were formed by Love . . . for love.  And the greatest gift we can give our great God is to let His love make us glad." ~Ann Voskamp, The Greatest Gift

 

It's December and I can already tell that this Christmas season is going to fly by; only 22 days until the big day.  It feels like there is so much to do in such a short amount of time as I try to cram in as much as I can to make this holiday special for the little ones.

However, last month I committed to myself that I would look at the holiday season differently this year. I would be more intentional about remembering what the season is really about and not try to rush through it, but instead slow down. As part of that, I am reading The Greatest Gift by Ann Voskamp. In her book, she invites her readers to look at Christmas as a celebration of a love story; a love story of the God who has been pursuing our hearts since the very beginning.

God's infinite love has been a theme that has come up a lot for me during the last few months. I have been taught about God's love all my life, but that deeper understanding of how great His love for us is has been becoming more apparent recently.

And that is what this season of Advent and Christmas is truly about. It is remembering that He loved us so completely that He gave up heaven to come down here. He gave up everything to arrive on this earth with nothing. He became the least of these so that we can be more and have more than this life offers.

So I am on a journey this advent season as I await the celebration of the birth of my Savior; the one who's love for me is greater than I could ever comprehend. Because it is out of His love that everything else flows and is made possible. As the days move closer towards December 25th, I want to be moving closer towards Him. My prayer every morning this December is that I will be filled with Him; so much so that it overflows to those around me.

Thankful for His Light

We had finished watching a gorgeous sunset and were headed back.  As we drove, the moon rose above the hill; large, orange and luminescent against a deep blue, quickly darkening sky.  I let out a loud, involuntary exclamation over the beauty of it, "look at the MOON!" and we quickly pulled over in an attempt to catch the splendor of this light.

And it was absolutely beautiful and breathtaking. I didn't get many photos and instead watched it rise higher and higher - a ball of orange and yellow, casting light through the clouds and illuminating the sky.



Photo Credit: Jonathan McGowan, Instagram: @jkrswld1234

I am amazed by the moon. This rock that's completely void of any light in itself, can light up the night sky so brilliantly and boldly as it reflects like a mirror, the light of the sun. It pierces the dark by simply allowing the sun to do what it is supposed to do.

In that moment it dawned on me that my calling, our calling, is so similar to that of the moon's.  I am called to be a light in the darkness, but thankfully I don't have to do it by own might. There was a sense of freedom that came from seeing it In that way. I do not have to generate this light by my own strength, but instead can be a reflection of His light and His love shining through me.

He "turns my darkness into light." He takes my imperfections, fears, doubts and failures and shines light in those dark areas creating hope, peace and love. When I allow God to be God and have His place in my life, than the rest begins to happen. His Spirit at work within me will allow me to be a source of light in the darkness and the hurt of those around me.  It will allow me to show love to those I come in contact with.

"For God, who said, "let light shine out of darkness," made His light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God's glory displayed in the face of Christ." 2 Corinthians 4:6

Because He is the source of all light and of all hope.

And the hope we have in Him. . .that hope does not disappoint.

"Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who has given to us." Romans 5:5 NKJV

In the end, that is what so many of us need is to know that there is hope. Even when things are difficult, we have the hope that all things are redeemed and all things are used for good. That is what the moon does in the darkness of night. It offers light and it offers the hope that there is still the sun on the other side doing its job.

So I am thankful for His light and that it can be present in me, and I am thankful for the hope that is found in that knowledge.

Thankful in a Fallen World

November is quickly and quietly slipping by.  In this month where we are to count our blessings, we also hear of thousands that have lost everything. This life here on earth, it isn't always an easy one. We live in a fallen world, full of hurting people and an enemy looking to destroy us.

 

It won't be until the other side of this life that we, and all that we are a part of, is perfect.

 

But God is good now and always, and He is here and He is in us. In a world that quakes with sadness and sends waves of destruction, God's love can still be seen. It is seen in the hands rebuilding broken homes, in those willing to give of their time and money to help those without, in an entire city that comes together to bring joy to a little boy and in the hearts that refuse to lose hope.

 

So I thank Him that He is still working and that He loves us. I lift up humbled heart and thank Him that even in a hurting world, I can trust Him to be present. I thank Him that I can stand on His promises and that because He loves us there is always hope.

And I whisper a prayer, half question and half assertion as I learn to trust, "your perfect love is casting out the fear and you have good, hope-filled plans for me and for this fallen world."